Grossman vs. Orton: Who gets the nod?

July 24th, 2008 - 1:14 pm

On Wednesday, Rex Grossman won a coin toss to earn the right to start that day’s practice with the first team. Kyle Orton will get the start today and then the two players will alternate every other day.

The idea of flipping a coin to determine who gets first crack at the starting job seems kind of arbitrary, which led me to ponder alternatives to the coin method. Here are a few:

Rock-Paper-Scissors
I can just see Ron Turner, Pep Hamilton, Caleb Hanie and Nick Hill huddled around Grossman and Orton in the quarterbacks meeting room at Olivet Nazarene University as the two embattled quarterbacks duel it out in a best-of-three, -five, or -seven competition.

American Gladiators
Grossman and Orton could have taken part in an American Gladiators event, including, but not limited to, the Joust, the Atlasphere (where they roll around in big metal balls), the Assault, where each player would take turns firing tennis balls at the other player, or they could take part in the final event, the Eliminator. If they were gladiators, their names would be Neckbeard and Small Fry.

Test of Manhood
Good old fashioned manly measurements. Pull out their units and see which quarterback is truly blessed by God.

Lumberjack Match
From the WWE wrestling glory days, the two quarterbacks can wrestle it out in the ring and if any player leaves the ring, he gets beat up by the lumberjacks (in this case, the entire starting defensive unit) and then gets thrown back into the ring. At least the two guys would get a taste of what it will feel like this year.

8-Mile Rap Battle
Each player gets on the mic and does some freestyle rapping and then let the teammates determine who the best emcee is.

American Idol
Probably more likely than the previous one, each player get on stage and sing and let the fans vote for the winner.

What else could the two players have done to determine who got the first shot with the starting offense?

Post a comment with your idea(s).

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